The Large Hadron Collider is a colossal waste of time and money

Talk about re-inventing the wheel. Why spend billions on trying to understand how stuff works and where it comes from when we already have a perfectly good theory of everything?

For those of you who haven't been paying attention for the last few thousand years, we already know the answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything. It goes like this: everything in the universe comes from the thing that made the things for which there is no known maker and that causes and directs the events we can't otherwise explain and doesn't need to have been made. Simple.

Why, in the name of the thing that made the things for which there is no known maker and that causes and directs the events we can't otherwise explain and doesn't need to have been made, would anybody need a better explanation than that? Answer me that one, Professor Brian smarty-pants Cox.