Cake eating for dummies

And [Labour] will call on MPs from all sides to back a "jobs first" Brexit that delivers the "exact same benefits" of the European single market and customs union.

Here in the magic kingdom of infinite cake, every good politician must believe* that the UK really can "have its cake and eat it" after leaving the European Union.  Never mind that, in the real world, grown-up people who actually know stuff have already explained how cake eating works in the simplest possible terms:

That was pure illusion, that one can have the EU cake and eat it too. To all who believe in it, I propose a simple experiment. Buy a cake, eat it, and see if it is still there on the plate.

EU Council President Donald Tusk, pointing out the bleeding obvious, nine months ago.

Na, na, na, we're not listening!



UPDATE - "We believe in cake everlasting, for ever and ever, amen. Burn the heretics!" now seems to be Labour's orthodox credo. God help us.

UPDATE 2 - Rule of thumb - once a story like this appears in the UK's only news organ of record, you know for sure that we're all doomed...

*Or pretend to believe.