Sir Alan Sugar will continue to front BBC One's The Apprentice, despite concerns over his new role working for the government as an "enterprise tsar".
So it's probably too late to stop the freakish contestants from breeding - it's like Jurassic Park, only worse:
There's an excellent article in the Guardian, about the 0845 / 0870 telephone number scam:
APPRENTICE stars Phil Taylor and Kate Walsh could be dangerously close to making numerous, smaller versions of themselves, experts warned last night...
Amid reports the pair were now dating, scientists said that if the couple's DNA is not kept at least 20 miles apart it could combine to produce an army of gibbering, soulless freaks obsessed with their own shallow, pointless ambitions...
Professor Brubaker and his team conducted a series of computer modelling experiments to predict what a Kate-Phil hybrid would look like. "We reckon it would be shaped like a Toblerone," he added.
"The entire raison d'etre of such a creature would be to pathetically ingratiate itself with millionaires by performing a series of demeaning voluntary tasks, like bleaching dogs' scrotums on Clapham Common. Other than that, it would just hop around pissing people off."
Meanwhile in foreign news, those Iranian "elections" in full.
Having got all the "the world's going to hell in a handcart" stories out of the way in one fell swoop, maybe I'll find something more optimistic to link to next time.
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